Your intrepid heroes visit the bank, grab some milk, and butcher quotes. POSTAL 2 faces the CHAIRQUISITION!
Game: Postal 2
Webzone: http://store.steampowered.com/app/223470/
Devel: Running with Scissors
Engine: Unreal Engine 1.5
Price: US$/€ 9.99 – CDN$ 10.99
Wazzat: Live a week in the life of “The Postal Dude”; a hapless everyman just trying to check off some chores. Buying milk, returning an overdue library book, getting Gary Coleman’s autograph, what could possibly go wrong?
CHAIRQUISITION:
Makes with the working
V-
- Flipped out when setting the resolution.
- It went into a 8X6 window but recovered when I clicked inside said window.
- However, the FERPS counter was stuck in the middle of the screen-organ.
J-
- It even has a 4k Option. Not that it really does much
P-
- Tried to fullscreen into both my monitors, failed, and disabled the one on the right.
- Open the Steam overlay in-game, move the window to another monitor and then try to use the mouse to navigate the menus, I dare you!
Total –
Shiny / Sounds
V-
- This came out after Unreal 2/UT 2003 *glares at Epic*
- Yeah, using the same engine.
- This critter looked bad when it was released and didn’t exactly make with the ageing.
- Guns go pew and shovels go thwack.
- I muted the FKR after Dude said his fifth or sixth edgy thing.
J-
- It certainly looks good for a 2003 game
- The voice acting is a bit of alright, but there’s only like four lines of dialogue
P-
- I’ve seen games released in 2015 that take double the amount of resources from your PC to even start, that still manage to look worse than this.
- The game was released originally in 2003 and on Linux in 2005
- I still want to slap the main character whenever he talks.
- Which, since I decided to go for the “good-guy” run, it happens a lot.
Total –
Control
V-
- Full controller support my arse.
- Default layout makes sense minus M for map.
J-
- Most of the bindings were sensible. Only two issues
- The scroll wheel mechanic is super sensitive
- Inventory management required me to take my hands off my mouse
P-
- Barring the issues with the Steam overlay I mentioned earlier, I can only say that SDL 1.2 was lacking in the non-US keyboard layout department.
- Most of the special keys in my portuguese layout keyboard cannot be bound.
Total –
FUN
V-
- ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ it’s Postal 2.
- I bought this in 05 and was kinda interested in the billions of updates.
- After an hour with this version all I could think was “where’s the popcorn?”
- It’s still shoot or don’t shoot ..the game. “Only as violent as you are”
- Most of the playtime is artificially inflated by running about trying to complete tasks.
- At best this is something for the twelve year olds to pick up so they can experience what was considered “edgy” the year they were born.
J-
- For a game that’s supposed to be about violent mayhem and wish fulfilment, I found it rather boring
- Run around, scavenge all the ammo and armor you can, stick a cat’s ass to the end of a shotgun and blast away
- I found the open world to be a bit lacking
P-
- It’s competent.
- It’s got that 90’s vibe of FPS and is clearly taking potshots at Duke Nukem with the voiced protagonist.
- Level design is a bit meh, it seems as though they wanted a Morrowind style open world with just the FPS mechanics.
- It doesn’t work when you’re targeting the FPS crowd and their mind is confined to corridors, lined with ammo pickups which you can easily traverse in a linear progression.
Total –
Final –
