ChairQAsition: Crashlands

Your intrepid heroes jump around, time out, and get stomped to death. Crashlands faces the CHAIRQUISITION!

Game: Crashlands
Webzone: Crashlands
Devel: Butterscotch Shenanigans
Engine: GameMaker: Studio
Price: £11.99 / US$14.99 / CA$17.49

Wazzat: Crashlands is a story-driven crafting ARPG set in an outlandish world of hidden magic and high technology. Fight and tame alien beasts, craft resources into menacing weaponry, befriend the locals, and go toe-to-chin with a world-domineering maniac.

Mandatory Disclosure: The devs sent us copies through Curator Connect

CHAIR– Nooope

CHAIRCHAIR– Not sure if want


CHAIRCHAIRCHAIRCHAIR– Shutupandtakemymonies

Makes with the working


  • Monitor keeps timing out.
  • Need to create an account to enable cloud saves.
  • Keep getting killed to death because of the monitor going dark.
  • Only one other game (out of 503) has this issue.


  • It loud
  • Also the “shapes” controller preset don’t work son!



Shiny / Sounds


  • Everything scales well because mobile.
  • Graphics are nice.
  • Think cutesy Don’t Starve.


  • All of the assets use a cartoony aesthetic
  • To be honest, it doesn’t really do anything for me
  • The game defaults to a loud as shit volume, and the soundtrack is kinda forgettable


  • For such a simple art style, there’s a lot of charm.
  • The dialog also helps.
  • The sense of humor in this game has a lot of overlap with LGC.
  • As repetitive as the soundtrack is, I didn’t find the need to immediately go and mute it.




  • Works really well the the Steam controller.
  • The only downside (it’s wicked annoying) is the auto lock on / aim thingy.
  • I know it’s there to replace the touch interface but it really gets in the way.


  • They offer a configuration mode for playstation style controllers, and the buttons on screen don’t correspond to those on the controller
  • WTF guys


  • Immediately recognized the Steam controller and everything works.
  • They also keep the labels on screen so there’s even less of a margin for error.




  • Lot of grinding here.
  • There is a fun little time waster hiding behind an egregious technical blunder.
  • Also, doubling the price from the mobile version is kinda a dick move.
  • And don’t tell me it was because you spent time reworking the game for PC.
  • If that was the case I would have Steam cloud saves instead of having to sign up to your bullsh*t service.
  • So, yeah, I noped out of this game after about an hour of on and off playtime.
  • The second time getting squished because screen timeout was the last nail in the coffin-organ.


  • Let’s be real here. This is just don’t starve
  • Sure there are quests and what not, but they always devolve to “go there, get this thing” or “go kill that” or “Build this thing” or some combination of the above
  • It gets pretty monotonous after a while
  • The game doesn’t do anything particularly original. Which is fine, but it just does the survival crafting thing kinda mediocrely
  • And that’s the big crime of this game. It’s boring. It isn’t engaging.


  • I like the idea behind these games.
  • It’s an RPG/Adventure game where you need to craft your way to success.
  • You have goal or at least a general direction and the quests/dialog help keep you driven.
  • This was the reason I enjoyed Planet Explorers a lot more than I did Minecraft.
  • That said, Planet Explorers realized just how grindy these kinds of games can get before you can make a significant enough impact in the world, or deal enough damage to the creatures around you.
  • In Crashlands that realization didn’t seem to happen.
  • Maybe it’s the mobile game DNA, with keeping you waiting for things to happen and having you do a lot of repetitive, menial tasks for a bit then giving you a quest where you go explore a bit of the map or kill some named monster.
  • The menial tasks are what you do during the day while you’re bored at work, then you come home and you play the actual adventury bit, since you have a bit more time to focus on the game.
  • I can see what it is, but I don’t like it.
  • This sort of design has no place in a PC game.
  • I don’t think of myself as a purist of video games but certain mediums do lend themselves better to different games.
  • And Crashlands, while not being absolutely terrible, doesn’t really shine on a PC.





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