Once more dawn broke the darkness. The light drove back the evil that fed on fear. This evil was well known and well feared by all. Each dawn was hailed and revered as the people’s savior. But each day only gave the people a short time to prepare for the coming night and time was sacred.
The aging king was dying and his blond prince Pedro was not ready to become a king. The king had to do something, something that would prepare his son for the evil he would have to face. Venn the Royal Scribe to the king heard of the king’s dilemma and thought of a way that he could himself take the throne. “My liege, I may have an answer to your … *ahem* … problem with the prince. You should have a contest, my lord, in which three heros of your choice fight for the right to be king and force your prince to be one of the contestants.” “What ho! A brilliant idea is this of yours. Write the rules at once scribe!” bellowed the king.
With the contest only weeks away, Venn the Scribe went to work. First he had to kill off every other hero that the king could possibly pick other than himself. Following the footsteps of Iago and Gr�ma Wormtongue, Venn the Scribe systematically poisoned each and every strong, homo-erotic, and handsome man he could find.
The plan was sound, nothing could possibly go wrong. With the prince’s complete lack of experience in battle the scribe would be the next heir. Nothing that is except Pedro the Blond Prince had been secretly taking fighting lessons with a mysterious tutor. Having learned most every known combat technique known in the kingdom in both melee and the secret forbidden arts of sorcery, Venn the Scribe wouldn’t have a chance.
With only one week before the contest to take place, it was time for the king to choose the ones who would fight for the future leadership of his realm. The trumpets played the far to familiar fanfare to introduce the heros. The crowds gasped as only one person came down the carpet which divided the royal throne room. As Venn the Scribe approached the throne, however, a man stood up pointing to the scribe exclaiming “You! This is the man who had me drowned. This is the man who thought me dead all these days! I am here to take what is mine. No one can deprive me of this now.” It was Jordan the Jew.
The king began to clap saying “It appears we have our three contestants, does it not? The games will begin in six days. Prepare thyselves for battle.”
After a tiresome and tedious five days of hard training and meditation, the day of decision had come. In a field some miles from the kingdom, an arena was constructed from timber and steel. The king, too week to sit now, watched from a bed moved into the arena stands. The arena doors creaked opened slowly as three men slowly walked into the clearing. Venn the Scribe with his bastard sword and wooden shield. Pedro the Pretty Boy Prince with his flowing blond hair and fire ball floating inches from his right un-scared hand. Jordan the Jew with his pet fire breathing dragon which stood 20 feet tall with a 40 foot wingspan.
“Fuck.” exclaimed both Venn and Pedro.
But then everyone’s shadows began to move at an alarming pace. Even in the middle of the day, darkness soon concealed everything. “What evil magic is this?!?!” cried the king. Then, from the center of the arena a dark purple tear ripped through the sand and dirt. A demon made of blue foam. metal, and springs rose from the newly formed hole.
Spinning and turning the demon began to destroy each and everyone in the arena. Save for the three in the center.
“We must work together to defeat this foe!” claimed Pedro the Prince just as Venn’s blade pierced through his neck with an explosion of blood spewing forth. “One down, one to arhgha” Just before Venn could finish, he was eaten by Jordan the Jew’s dragon.
The king, now split in twine by the blue demon, saw all of this and was about to speak when the dragon turned on its master, eating Jordan whole. As the king’s eyes began to shut down due to the lack of blood, the last thing he saw forever etched in his mind, was the blue demon… between the dragon’s legs.