- This topic has 7 replies, 8 voices, and was last updated 9 years, 9 months ago by
.
-
Posts
-
In this challenge you must work mighty hard. Who would win in a fight?
The best and worst story will win a copy of Rust (beta)
Around the around the 9:38 mark
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HRjE719lwVEhttp://store.steampowered.com/app/252490/
[img]http://cdn4.steampowered.com/v/gfx/apps/252490/ss_f02a18f96d602a0e05252402bd27831216c72f7f.600×338.jpg?t=1386787583[/img]
Venn
Pedro
Jordan
Thigh master
Winnars will be announced next week.
In a wild area, the evil sunshine mutated some people giving them aggressive qualities, namely: Gay Venn, Hipster Pedro and Canadian Jordan on the field fighting for their lives. At the epic battlefield the three lined up, but before they could jump at each others throat a Wild Tigh Master appears! No one knows what happened at that warzone-ish field but the outcome is indisputable, only Gay Venn stood tall at the raped and ruined bodies of his fellow nemesis’s and obstacles.
Back in the day……. a group of guys that you never would have thought of seeing in the same room came together.
Venn the founder of WHEEFC.
Jordan the Co-founder of WHEEFC.
Pedro the blonde sex toy of Venn and Jordan.
The Pedro Ass Tightner….Per Jordan………….
In that moment of coming together they created a club. That club was called “We Hate Everyone Equal Fight Club”.
The Rules were:
1st RULE: You do not talk about WHEE FIGHT CLUB.
2nd RULE: You DO NOT talk about WHEE FIGHT CLUB.
3rd RULE: If someone says “stop” or goes limp, taps out the fight is over.
4th RULE: Only two guys to a fight.
5th RULE: One fight at a time.
6th RULE: No shirts, no shoes.
7th RULE: Fights will go on as long as they have to.
8th RULE: If this is your first night at WHEE FIGHT CLUB, you HAVE to fight.
With the ground work laid out with the rules, they were ready for there first night meeting in the tavern basement of Venn’s favourite hangout. The first night was only the 3 by themselves. Nothing new to them since they had sordid trysts on a regular basis. Using and pitching to Pedro the catcher. Who by the way defeated the Thigh Master to become the Ass lightener Champion.
So for the first fight that night it was Jordan and Pedro. Pedro acted all crazy to try and put Jordan off. Jordan just laughed and said “I will lay you out and give it to you good.” Pedro took this as he was about to get his ass beat. What he didn’t know was Jordan was meaning he was going to stomp him then violate him.
The fight started and Pedro got in a few quick jabs, then that was it. Jordan just picked up Pedro and slammed him to the ground like a rag doll. Then Jordan realized Pedro was unconscious and he proceeded to conquer Pedro more, by violating him. when he was done he dragged Pedro’s body to the side and challenged Venn.
Upon seeing Jordan stomp Pedro then violate him, Venn decided he was going to move slow so Jordan would have no clue what hurt was about to become him. Jordan started yelling at Venn and telling him he was going make him catch.
In the back of Venn’s mind he was thinking Jordan sure would be a good fight and maybe a good lay. Just as that thought passed through Venn’s head, Jordan landed a right hook on the right side of Venn’s face. Venn backed up and shook it off. Jordan was a bit surprised. Venn then grabbed Jordan and slung him around like a rag doll. Jordan tried to get free, but the more he struggled the more Venn tightened his grip. Venn got bored with Jordan and threw him into the wall were Jordan hit so hard, he fell to the floor and didn’t move. He did moan though and that turned Venn on. The more Jordan moaned the more excited Venn got.
Venn then said “If you moan one more time Jordan you will just have to deal with it.” Without another pause Jordan moaned loudly. Venn then said “I likes ya, and I wants ya. Now we can do this the easy way, or we can do it the hard way. The choice is yours.”
Jordan never heard a word he was not in this world. So Venn took Jordan and made him catch.
When the night was over Venn was declared the WHEE Fight Club winner of that night.
Once upon a time there were 3 fighters. Venn, Pedro, and Jordan was born and raised in remote colony in the mountains where the most dedicated of all known nerds taught new nerds the art. They all spent many hours honing their skills in the deadly art of Linux. They all knew one day though, that only one of these nerds could remain.
Today was that day. In anticipation they all stepped into the arena simply known as… The Terminal. One by one they removed their pocket protectors and placed them neatly at the ground beside them. Venn eyed Pedro. Pedro winked back. This perplexed Venn very much. Venn then looked over to Jordan. Jordan was deep in thought, knuckle high into his nose trying to clear his brain.
The bell rung and they all darted towards the center of the dusty arena. Pedro met Venn first in this epic battle. He used his signature girly slap that he was known through out the lands for. This did not seem to phase Venn one bit. Venn did a hair whip that knocked Pedro to his ass. Having used the thigh master to put between his butt cheeks, umm, late at night. He had an amazingly strong gluteus maximus. As he hit the ground he immediately bounced back up using his ass muscles alone. This left Venn stunned. Pedro seen his opening. He did the paralysing crouch cruncher. Venn was at his submission now.
Then… Jordan finally joined the melee. Out of breath he didn’t know from running the 20 feet, he had very few options at his disposal. Pedro still had Venn by the balls but they both noticed that Jordan pulled out a taco. This was no ordinary taco either. This was one of the ones from the taco stand that came every Friday at noon. But no one had seen Miguel or his taco stand for months. Had he been hiding tacos in his room for all these months? Apparently so, as could be seen by the weird green fur that was on the outside of it. Jordan bit into the taco, swallowing it whole like a hungry, hungry hippo. Venn and Pedro had no idea what Jordan was doing. Venn bitch slapped Pedro causing him to release his death grip on his family’s jewels.
Venn didn’t know what Jordan was up to but knew that he had to stop him. He ran towards Jordan. Pedro ran after Venn. Jordan turned his back to them both as if he wasn’t even concerned with neither one of them. As Venn and Pedro approached closer, Jordan pulled his finger. At that very moment his ass cheeks rippled with the furiousness of 100 earthquakes. Venn and Pedro heard nothing but where blown back with ragdoll physics only known in the far off land RimJob. They both brushed themselves off and seemed to be okay. . . until they stood up. There nose hairs were lit on fire, stomachs lost control, and brain burned inside their very heads.
He admired his handy work as Venn and Pedro were reduced to small piles of gooey mess. Jordan had pulled off the most sacred move known to all the nerds on the mountain,The Silent But Deadly.
–the end
Once more dawn broke the darkness. The light drove back the evil that fed on fear. This evil was well known and well feared by all. Each dawn was hailed and revered as the people’s savior. But each day only gave the people a short time to prepare for the coming night and time was sacred.
The aging king was dying and his blond prince Pedro was not ready to become a king. The king had to do something, something that would prepare his son for the evil he would have to face. Venn the Royal Scribe to the king heard of the king’s dilemma and thought of a way that he could himself take the throne. “My liege, I may have an answer to your … *ahem* … problem with the prince. You should have a contest, my lord, in which three heros of your choice fight for the right to be king and force your prince to be one of the contestants.” “What ho! A brilliant idea is this of yours. Write the rules at once scribe!” bellowed the king.
With the contest only weeks away, Venn the Scribe went to work. First he had to kill off every other hero that the king could possibly pick other than himself. Following the footsteps of Iago and Gr�ma Wormtongue, Venn the Scribe systematically poisoned each and every strong, homo-erotic, and handsome man he could find.
The plan was sound, nothing could possibly go wrong. With the prince’s complete lack of experience in battle the scribe would be the next heir. Nothing that is except Pedro the Blond Prince had been secretly taking fighting lessons with a mysterious tutor. Having learned most every known combat technique known in the kingdom in both melee and the secret forbidden arts of sorcery, Venn the Scribe wouldn’t have a chance.
With only one week before the contest to take place, it was time for the king to choose the ones who would fight for the future leadership of his realm. The trumpets played the far to familiar fanfare to introduce the heros. The crowds gasped as only one person came down the carpet which divided the royal throne room. As Venn the Scribe approached the throne, however, a man stood up pointing to the scribe exclaiming “You! This is the man who had me drowned. This is the man who thought me dead all these days! I am here to take what is mine. No one can deprive me of this now.” It was Jordan the Jew.
The king began to clap saying “It appears we have our three contestants, does it not? The games will begin in six days. Prepare thyselves for battle.”
After a tiresome and tedious five days of hard training and meditation, the day of decision had come. In a field some miles from the kingdom, an arena was constructed from timber and steel. The king, too week to sit now, watched from a bed moved into the arena stands. The arena doors creaked opened slowly as three men slowly walked into the clearing. Venn the Scribe with his bastard sword and wooden shield. Pedro the Pretty Boy Prince with his flowing blond hair and fire ball floating inches from his right un-scared hand. Jordan the Jew with his pet fire breathing dragon which stood 20 feet tall with a 40 foot wingspan.
“Fuck.” exclaimed both Venn and Pedro.
But then everyone’s shadows began to move at an alarming pace. Even in the middle of the day, darkness soon concealed everything. “What evil magic is this?!?!” cried the king. Then, from the center of the arena a dark purple tear ripped through the sand and dirt. A demon made of blue foam. metal, and springs rose from the newly formed hole.
Spinning and turning the demon began to destroy each and everyone in the arena. Save for the three in the center.
“We must work together to defeat this foe!” claimed Pedro the Prince just as Venn’s blade pierced through his neck with an explosion of blood spewing forth. “One down, one to arhgha” Just before Venn could finish, he was eaten by Jordan the Jew’s dragon.
The king, now split in twine by the blue demon, saw all of this and was about to speak when the dragon turned on its master, eating Jordan whole. As the king’s eyes began to shut down due to the lack of blood, the last thing he saw forever etched in his mind, was the blue demon… between the dragon’s legs.
THE END
“>
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
