This week your intrepid heroes invent a new drinking game, look at hipster-pixels, and play a shameless Sonic clone. Freedom Planet faces the CHAIRQUISITION!
Game: Freedom Planet
Webzone: http://store.steampowered.com/app/248310
Devel: GalaxyTrail
Engine: Multimedia Fusion
Price: $/€14.99 – $16.99 CAD
Wazzat: Fight your way across the celestial world of Avalice where cats are green, motorcycles drive up walls and monster girls do most of the buttkicking!
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CHAIRQUISITION:
Makes with the working
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Shiny / Sounds
V-
- It’s a pixelated mess.
- No resolution options so it’s a scaled pixilated mess.
- Even at 4M (yes, I measured) it still looks like molten pixel goo.
- And what’s up with that transition animation from running up a ramp to level ground.
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- This game takes a lot from the sonic the hedgehog playbook
- The running in this just looks so slow though. How do you fuck that up?
- The voice acting is Okay
- Seriously, I think Yuji Naka is gonna sue somebody
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- Look at all the hipster pixel!
- Voice actors recorded in different places.
- Some characters sound louder and crisper than others.
- The music is kinda like Sonic’s except more annoying
- All the “hmph!” “typhoon” “yah!” got this game muted within the half-hour mark.
- I can’t give it 1 chair, because the graphics and the sound are there and you can see/hear them.
- But I’ll give the lowest possible because they’re terrible!
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Control
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- I had to commit some fuckery to get the Xclone to work.
- Was intermittent controller support listed on the store page?
- It “works” with the XClone but every movement or button press is considered a suggestion.
J-
- Tried with both a Dualshock 3 and Two different 360 controllers. Neither were detected. Steam sees them though, as do most other games
- Standard two button run and attack scheme
- However, if you expect me to platform without a controller, you get one chair
- The third xbox controller finally worked. The controls are decent enough. However, you still get one chair for making me go through all that work
P-
- Sonic-like platformer that in 9 minutes ignored over 10 of my jumping keystrokes.
- Controller? Fuck your controllers!
- Neither the DualShock with Xboxdrv or the NVidia Controller were detected.
- What’s that, you’d like to reassign controls? Aha, fuck you!
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FUN
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- This is a shameless Sonic clone.
- It looks worse and handles worse er er #moreworse
- It captures nothing from the original and the real kicker … it’s slower.
J-
- Let’s just ignore for a second that this is a two bit sonic the hedgehog knockoff
- You expect me to platform without the use of a controller.
- The game falls short of capturing the sonic experience.
- Worst of all, it’s just boring. And for a game, that’s criminal
P-
- Running the risk of pissing all over someone’s favorite furry game
- And trust me when I say I have no issue with fursons and their fursonas.
- This could have been a competent Sonic & Knuckles clone.
- It has the two characters with slightly different abilities that allow you to reach different parts of each level and beat bosses a different way.
- Unfortunately, whatever positives it may have had are knocked right back down with graphics that make the Genesis look competent, incongruent voice-acting, and borderline non-functional controls.
- $15 when it’s not on sale, fuck no!
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