This week your intrepid heroes defy physics, lick airplanes, and unlock our inner Michael Bay.
Chairquisition:
Game: \m/ simulator
Webzone: http://www.goat-simulator.com/
Devel: Coffee Stain Studios
Engine: Unreal Engine 3
Price: $/€9.99
Wazzat: Goat Simulator is the latest in goat simulation technology, bringing next-gen goat simulation to YOU. You no longer have to fantasize about being a goat, your dreams have finally come true! WASD to write history.
Makes with the working
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Still nopes when changing zones.
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Does not save game progress (I noticed this AFTER collecting 15 statues)
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No crashing on the calculator!
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Shiny / Sounds
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I don’t know what it is about the soundtrack ..but I dig it.
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Explosions splode, people scream etc.. no complaints.
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/W everything on 11 it’s completely playable minus the occasional slowdown during complex scenes. (in all fairness this is usually me collecting 50 splode tanks)
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Dont’ even THINK about enabling MSAA
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UE3 is second only to Unity when it comes to lack of optimization.
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To get an even remotely playable frame count on the open sauce drivers, I needed to turn just about every graphical “enhancement” off.
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Control
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Because I don’t play a FPG /w a controller.
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No issue /w keyboard + gerbil controls.
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Contoller support is fucked
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Mouse sensitivity has two modes:
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ZOMG look at me so twitchy; and
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Slide mouse off the desk to look slightly to the right.
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FUN
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The game is surprisingly deep for what it is. Good on the devs for that
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XCOM: Enemy Unknown is the better UE3 port! Sorry, Ryan.
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Bugs are fun until they force you to restart the level.
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And when you have to restart it for the third time in less than 2 minutes because the roads become ethereal and you fall through the world, all its charm kinda goes out the window.
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Final –
