ChairQAsition: The Silver Case

Your intrepid heroes test The Silver Case on three Linux powered boxes of business. Did it pass? Come find out.

Game: The Silver Case
Webzone: The_Silver_Case
Devel: GRASSHOPPER MANUFACTURE INC.
Engine: Unity
Price: £14.99 / US$ 19.99 / CA$ 21.99

Wazzat: The Silver Case – the debut title from world-renowned developer SUDA51 has been fully remastered and localized to English for the first time ever!

Mandatory Disclosure: The Devs sent keys.


CHAIRQUISITION:
CHAIR– Nooope

CHAIRCHAIR– Not sure if want

CHAIRCHAIRCHAIR– Check it out

CHAIRCHAIRCHAIRCHAIR– Shutupandtakemymonies


Makes with the working

V-CHAIRCHAIRCHAIRCHAIR

  • The remaster was developed using the Unity 5 game engine
  • The main problem with the port was that the original source code had been lost, so the audio data needed to be extracted from the PlayStation disc version.

J-CHAIRCHAIRCHAIRCHAIR

  • SWEET MOTHER OF LOUD

P-CHAIR

  • The game is downright unplayable in non-english locales
  • If you don’t add LC_ALL=C %command% to the advanced launch options the graphics are pitch black, you can’t load a game and you can’t progress at all.
  • This is <current year argument>
  • This kind of shit was bad enough when it first happened when Unity games started coming out, it’s even worse now.

Total-CHAIRCHAIRCHAIR


Shiny / Sounds

V-CHAIRCHAIR

  • Remaster?
  • I went back and watched some PS1 gameplay and I think a better definition would be “mildly enhanced”
  • Delicious polygons
  • That said, I like the background music.

J-CHAIRCHAIR

  • I mean, “HD” remaster in this case just means that all the art assets are HD, which means fewer pixels
  • Otherwise, it kind of reminds me of some Strider-esque neue wave cinema
  • Which, you know, could work for the genre of the game, but the dialogue is super bad
  • Protip: Alternating mental cast members Bill Cosby, Snaggletooth and Frank’n’Furter make this a much more entertaining read

P-CHAIR

  • I almost wish the locale bug made it so I couldn’t hear the sound effects because goddamn, that typing noise is so annoying and loud.
  • Graphics look like something out of the PS1 era.
  • And seeing as this came out in 1999, it probably was.
  • And even then, on the i5 6200U laptop it runs at 10FerPS
  • So it’s horribly unoptimized, on top of just looking like shit.

Total-CHAIR


Control

V-CHAIRCHAIR

  • Oh sweet mother of flaming nope.
  • You get a bonus soda for attempting a point-and-click in the PS1 era.
  • You also get smashed in the face-organ with a Chair for keeping that bullsh*t in place.
  • You knew the control scheme was nightmare-fuel back in 1999.
  • Yes, you added a WASD option but getting to it is the problem.
  • Hell, I’ve counted three references to how the controls “might seem confusing” in the game proper.
  • Keyboard is somehow worse.

J-CHAIRCHAIR

  • Very much an early 3d console point and click game ported to PC
  • And yeah, the control scheme is a wee fucked up
  • You do get used to it though. The trick is to just not use a mouse when playing the point and click sections

P-CHAIRCHAIR

  • The controls work.
  • This seems to be the sole thing which did before forcing all locales to C, system-wide.
  • They’re still bad, though.
  • It does the Myst thing of letting you spin in place and move to another square on the map.
  • Not impressed.

Total-CHAIRCHAIR


FUN

V-CHAIR

  • This is about as much of a “game” as Gone Home: You’re Drunk.
  • It’s a visual novel / walking simulator mixed with the occasional puzzle.
  • The criminal thing is the hot mess of what they claim to be a game interface.
  • I lasted a little over an hour before giving up.

J-CHAIR

  • #bigdickchinchilla
  • This was always supposed to be an experimental game
  • When you have time, resource and budget constraints, sometimes the answer to your problems is to go way the hell out there
  • I never really played any of SUDA51’s other games, so I don’t really have a sense of what makes his sauce super special
  • It does some visually interesting things, which again ties back to the limitations, but it doesn’t really make up for the main deficiency
  • Since this is a text game though, the experience is defined by the text of the game. And hoo boy
  • I get the sense that the dialogue is supposed to be people talking normally, but hot damn. There are some points when people start repeating shit that I thought the game was glitching out
  • I also still have no idea who any of these people talking are

P-CHAIR

  • I think I found my most hated game of 2017.
  • I thought nothing could top spaceBOUND in the “making me violently ill with anger” category, this year.
  • I was wrong.
  • This is the kind of game I hate the most.
  • The mechanics are there solely to make you work for SUDA51’s masturbatory stiffy over his storytelling.
  • The graphics barely even register, since all of the important bits are just glorified JPEGs which get smeared on screen to indicate something is happening.
  • There’s so much text on screen at any point I felt like I’d be better off with audiobook version of this game.
  • If you want to experience this game like I did, the best way would be to watch a let’s play of the original Myst on youtube (without fullscreening) which was recorded in 240×160, mute the audio, have someone tap along on an old digital typewriter right next to your ears and focus on the text below the video.
  • Are you bored yet?

Total-CHAIR


Final –CHAIR

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